Nineteen years ago, I made a vow never to fly on an airplane again.
Back then, I found myself on a 90 minute, extremely turbulent flight, crying uncontrollably, while clinging to my mother’s arm. While strapped tightly in my seat, I could feel the plane suddenly drop and then rise again, and wobble in all directions, making me feel nauseous and totally helpless. No amount of consoling would help. Rescue Remedy did not help. Prayers did not help. Deep breathing did not help. I knew, without a doubt, that we were going to die.
Now, 19 years later, I was ready to fly again. My sister was surprised when I said I was booking airline tickets for the holidays. She remembered my sob story every year about my fear, not being able to travel 16 hours by car, and being alone at Christmas. But now she was expecting me for New Year’s Eve.
I used my recent training in PSYCH-K® to work on my fear of flying. I chose new belief statements: I love to fly. I enjoy flying. I’m safe and comfortable when flying. I make it to my destination safely and without incident.
Deep down inside, I didn’t believe any of those statements (remembering the vow that I took and the terrible experience I had before). So, I worked several months on replacing those beliefs, both alone and with another PSYCH-K® facilitator.
It helped a lot with the flight arrangements: I was able to purchase the airline tickets, book my ride to the airport, secure someone to push me in a wheelchair (knee issues) and even felt at ease while waiting at the gate. I was even calm when we took off and leveled out. But then, we hit turbulence, and my fear came rushing back.
Luckily, I was seated next to a young woman who turned out to be a minister, who reminded me to breathe deeply, and her warm hand on my shoulder, offered so much comfort and support. She was sent by God to get me through the experience, and I am so grateful that she was next to me on that flight.
So, why, after all that PSYCH-K® work, did I still experience fear? Because, I had not addressed the deeper underlying issues. It was not just about fear of flying, it was more about the fear of falling (I’ve never been able to jump off a high diving board). Not trusting the pilot, and most of all, my fear of dying (yes, I still feared that, even though I’ve watched countless videos of how wonderful life after death can be).
Later that week, my brother-in-law drove me home one evening and we experienced multiple bumps on the road. I closed my eyes and pretended that I was on an airplane. It was the same experience. I had felt that vibration in a car a thousand times before. I knew the driver and trusted him. I did not have to breathe deeply. I was familiar with the feeling of not being in control in that situation. And I had no fear. It’s the repetition and familiarity with the event that helps the fear dissipate. I had not had that kind of repetition on an airplane.
Before my flight home, I was encouraged (by other PSYCH-K® facilitators) to try another process called TPS or Transform Perception of Stress. I imagined being onboard an aircraft, and feeling the sensation of falling, crashing, and dying, and what that would feel like. It was not easy.
After an indefinite amount of time, while in whole brain posture, I finally came to peace with that experience. (MAJOR STUFF!) I had also worked on new belief statements: It’s OK that I broke my vow to never fly again…. I trust the pilot, the staff, the maintenance crew, and the science behind the safety of flying…. And, I am calm and fearless.
After balancing on these statements and doing this work, my flight back was much more peaceful. Granted, we did not fly into a storm on the way home, but we did have a bit of turbulence, and I handled it well. I still took rescue remedy, recited my new belief statements and breathed deeply. I was in whole brain posture for most of the flight, but without the intense and debilitating fear that I had experienced before.
I learned firsthand that it may take several PSYCH-K® sessions and the willingness to go deeper, before the fears finally subside. Sometimes, it’s immediate, and other times, it happens in stages, as it did for me.
Also, after a PSYCH-K® session, if the new belief does not appear to be working, we examine the Secondary Gain that we may receive, by not changing our belief. In my case, I was craving sympathy from telling my story, having people feel sorry for me, and how I would be alone for the holidays.
PSYCH-K® did work for me enough to help me face my fears. The more I fly and the more I use this process, the easier it will become. Having a powerful tool like PSYCH-K® helps me move forward and be able to function in life.
So, my next flight is scheduled. The tickets are purchased. The hotel is booked, the itinerary is set, and most importantly, you don’t have to feel sorry for me anymore because, thanks to PSYCH-K®, I’m free to fly again!
